Tag Archive for infidelity

How Long is Too Long to Date? Part 2

commitment-phobiaGood day, folks!  Let’s continue with this conversation on how long a Christian should date a person before getting married.  Yesterday I shared the first myth that prevents some couples from tying the knot sooner rather than later or sometimes never.  Today I will share the second.

Myth # 2:  I can’t be with the same man/woman for the rest of my  life.

This sounds like a fear of commitment, and you did not inherit that trait from your Heavenly Father.  He (father, son, and holy ghost) is the perfect example of true commitment.  He is so committed to you that He gave His only son to die for you so that you could be saved.  He is so committed to you that He loves you through everything–the good, the bad, and the ugly.  He is even so committed to you that he promised to never leave you nor forsake you.  That’s commitment at its finest. On top of that, He’s not given you the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7).

But I do know who the commitment phobia is coming from.  Satan.  He is the one who couldn’t be committed to righteousness since the beginning and the one who introduced that ungodly mindset to the world for the purpose of getting others to join him. The reason he got kicked out of heaven was because his pride got the best of him.  He turned against God, and refused to follow. That’s commitment at its worst. Then he showed up in the Garden of Eden to test Adam and Eve’s commitment to God, and unfortunately his trickery worked.  They failed the commitment test because of Satan’s lies.  Even today, he’s deceiving believers of Christ to think that it’s too hard or not worth it to commit their lives to God when there are so many others things they could be doing to satisfy the cravings of the flesh.  Beloved, do not be fooled by Satan’s gimmicks and do not join his bandwagon by believing that you can’t commit to one spouse until death do you part.  You can do all things through Christ who gives you the strength you need (Philippians 4:13).  You can live holy and be satisfied with one person in every way.  Jesus Christ and His grace make it possible to do. You may have been hesitant to make a commitment to live for Christ before you got saved because of a fear of failure, but now that you are saved do you regret it? Do you feel as if eternity is too long a time to commit to Him?  If you know anything about Him, I’m quite sure you want to be in this relationship for the long haul because it is so good.

And so is marriage.  Everything God made is good.  We just have to maintain it in order to continue enjoying the blessings of it. Of course a marriage relationship (heck, any relationship) can get stale if you allow it to.  So if you are worried that the flame will die down with time, be aware that it is your responsibility to add more wood to the fire; to put more coals on the grill; to put more kerosene in the heater (you see where I’m going with this).  If you are worried that somehow you will not be able to keep your marriage vows past the seven year itch, be aware that help is available to you if you would only ask.

“We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality.  He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all–all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help” (Hebrews 4:15-16 Message).  

IJS

What are your thoughts?  Feel free to offer more myths about marriage that need debunking (I love that word.)  And be on the lookout for myth # 3 in tomorrow’s post.

***For more tips on keeping things spicy in your marriage check out www.patchingcracks.com.

I Love Olivia Pope, Flaws and All–NOT!

scandal

I just saw Kerry Washington’s interview on The View, and I was pleased.  Pleased with her response to women who say that they want to be like Olivia Pope.  She said it’s fine if you want to talk like her or dress like her, but not if you’re talking about sleeping with married men and drinking wine all day.  So true.  I admit that I do love her wardrobe (the Scandal clothing line is in The Limited now by the way), but I recognize that her relationship with the POTUS is indeed a character flaw for obvious reasons.  It’s not a trait to be desired or applauded.  No one likes a home wrecker.  In fact I’m rooting for one of two things to happen by the end of this show–Mellie to defeat Liv in the battle for her marriage (with Fitz being all in of course) or for Mellie to move on and be happy with someone else while leaving Fitz alone to lament the loss of his wife, who was the best woman for him, and the loss of his lover.  That’s right.  I said A-lone.  My idea of a happy ending does NOT include Liv and Fitz riding off into the sunset together or standing in the sun together for that matter.  It involves true reconciliation of a covenant relationship ordained by God, which is marriage between a man and a woman.  If I can’t get that then I’ll settle for Fitz paying dearly for the heck he’s put his wife through because of another woman.  He should not be rewarded for his indiscretions by getting to live happily ever after with his mistress.  I know, I know.  It’s just a television show, and you’re probably thinking that it’s not that serious.  But I happen to like the show, and I happen to have strong feelings about this one key piece of the plot puzzle as all respectable, God-fearing women should.  Besides, I would hate for the enemy, satan, to subtly deceive you into thinking that this behavior is acceptable through an innocent woman crush on Olivia Pope.  First Lady Michelle Obama and I agree.

michelle

I love this!

lol.  I’m just sayin’.

I wonder what all y’all Scandal fans are thinking.  What is your prediction of Olivia and the Prez’s future?